Tuesday, July 12, 2011

Heat Exhaustion, Sexy Faces, and Girl Crushes

Whenever I know I'm going to forget something (which is pretty much always), I like to put the responsibility on other people to remind me.  That way, when I forget later, I can just blame them instead of acknowledging that I have early onset-Alzheimer's Disease.

Take, for example, last weekend.  On Friday, as you know, my friend KT and I were getting ready to attend the Basilica Block Party.  I was packing my shit into a bag, smiling and whistling with happiness as I neatly folded my slutty cool summer dress, an extra pair of undies, a bottle of tequila, and my jammies into my backpack for a night of pure musical bliss in 90 degree heat.  I noted that I had left my new camera upstairs, and that I would have to remember to place it in my backpack prior to our departure that afternoon.  

Fast forward a few hours, when I was running errands with my dear mother.  I suddenly remember that of COURSE I had forgotten to put my camera in my backpack like I was supposed to, so I say, "Mom, can you PULEEEEEEEEZ remind me to put my camera in my purse before I leave?" 

You know how moms are.  They think they know everything.  She says, "Of course I will remind you!  Though I don't know why you just don't do things right away when you think of them, you know you always forget like the time you forgot such-and-such a thing when we went to such-and-such a place.  I wonder what other examples I can think of so I can further deride you for the memory loss that I myself passed down to you through my faulty DNA.  But NOOOOOO, you NEVER listen to your MOTHER!"

Or something like that.

Anyway, the block party.  Guess what I forgot?  Yep, my camera.  And WHY did I forget it?  Obviously because of my mother.

So I'll do my best to dazzle you all with the details of this wondrous night, complete with shitty photos taken with my extremely ghetto cellular device.  My apologies in advance.

First, we have the Basilica.  The event is pretty cool, because it takes place right outside this beautiful landmark:

Stolen from MetroMix.com
We arrived at the block party right on time, as there were only a few people lingering around the dance floor at the stage where G. Love and Special Sauce would soon be rocking our socks off.  I was forced to make a quick and sort of heartbreaking decision when two young men who had spots up at the rail went darting off to the side of the stage to meet the one and only G. Love who was standing a mere ten feet away from me behind a fence!  But, I opted for stealing the boys' awesome spots at the rail instead of whoring myself out to my future husband favorite guy on Earth.  And it's a good thing I did, because otherwise I would have totally missed out on this:

Where's Waldo?  Er, I mean G. Love.
I totes made eye contact with G. Love several times, I swear!  LOVE IS IN THE AIR, PEOPLE!  As for his set, it was fabulous as always, if a little more reserved than his other shows.  I suppose he had to cut back when playing on the steps of a Catholic church, because I don't think the pastor would be very happy with the sweet sounds of "Who's Got The Weed?" ringing out over the steeple.  He did play the dirty version of "Booty Call" though, which I'd like to think was because he saw me ogling at him in the front row.

I suppose it didn't hurt that my titty kept popping out of my stupid dress, which proved to be an extremely annoying ailment throughout the evening.  More on that later.

After G. Love's set, he threw his thumb pick towards me, but evidently he is a wuss because it landed in the grass over the rail.  At this point, I was intoxicated extremely excited, and nearly killed myself trying to get to it, but it proved to be too far a reach.  So, I screamed at recruited a young man who was working "security" to get it for me, his name was Marty.  Marty looked thoroughly confused as I (not to mention dozens of people around me) hollered at him to pick up the thumb pick, but he bent over anyway and groped around for a while trying to find it in the grass.  Thankfully, my titty took that opportunity to pop out of my dress again, so when he looked up from his search, he had no choice but to hand the pick to the girl who's breast was practically in his face.  (Benefits of being a woman?  I think so!)

Next, the lovely and talented Fitz and the Tantrums took to the stage!  I got the pleasure of seeing this lovely lady up close and personal:

I immediately had a girl crush on her, especially once she started singing.  For those of you unfamiliar with Fitz and the Tantrums, I suggest you take a listen:


After Fitz, we were then graced with the presence of Michael Franti and Spearhead, who certainly knew how to put on a show.  Michael would routinely jump into the crowd to give us sweaty hugs, and he said things like, "Love one another, y'all!  Life is grand!  Hold the hand of the person next to you and wave it around!  I LOVE YOU ALL!!!!"

Yay for shitty phone.
At first, I appreciated all this lovey-time, but I have to admit it got a little old after a while. Also, his guitarist had the oddest facial expressions I have ever seen.  It really gave me horrifying insight into what he must look like during sex.

You can't see it very well, but he's making a total sexy face.  And it ain't cute.
Other than a terrifying moment where I thought I was either going to puke or pass out during "Say Hey (I Love You)", the whole night was a raving success!  We stumbled back to our shitty hotel and called it a night.

Note: See what I did there?  I totes admitted that I nearly passed out from intoxication, or puked on someone, but then casually kept blabbing so I wouldn't have to delve into it.  Because seriously folks, no one wants to be that d-bag that passed out in the front row and had to be carried out on a stretcher.  Totally kills the mood.  Luckily, that wasn't me.

The next day, I was poking around on MetroMix.com to look at pictures from the show, and guess which picture shows up right on the front page?

Who's that idiot in the yellow?  Yes, it's moi.
For the record, my titty was poking out a little in that pic, but you have to look really hard to see it.
All in all, the night was well worth the price of a ticket and the shitty hotel, and I'd do it again in a heartbeat.  My only regret is leaving my DAMN CAMERA at home with my MOTHER!  Arghhhhhh.

Hope you all had a great weekend too!!



Johnny Madrid aka Tim E. said...

Ah, awesome. Looks like it was a blast. I had a little thing going on as well with that bass player chick from that weird ass band Le Savy Fav. She never smiled though...now that i think of it. It was more of a "What the fuck are you looking at?" kind of thing actually...damn.

Nadiine said...

Looks like you had a great time and props for being at the front! x

Deidre said...

Wow sounds like so much fun!

Meri said...

A celebrity in our midst :)
Looks like it was fun- Mr Franti tends to put on a good show- thing he was rollin' on some X or just happy to be alive haha? Or maybe he saw your boob and taht's why he was full of love haha

theTsaritsa said...

Glad you had a good time! I like making eye contact with the singers, too! haha :)

Annah said...

Awww you looks so cutie in that last pic! :)

Even if I have no idea who those peeps are that you mentioned from the concert. I need to leave Miami more. We have no fun festivals of this sort here. It's all hip hop and trance around these neck o' the woods.

Roxanne and Lorraine said...

I love that Moneygrabber song. It's on my current, "pay no attention to work!" playlist. And look at you! Famous AGAIN. And you only had to flash a little boob for it. Lucky.